My Un-Supermom Self
I started the week feeling like I would accomplish a lot. I said I would pack, clean, spend a day at the aquarium and run errands. Pretty typical, minus the packing. On Monday I was feeling frazzled and out of sorts. My house was a disaster, I was panicking about the impending move, I was unshowered at 11, hadn’t washed my hair in days, I felt completely unproductive and very un-supermom. I was/am also feeling completely unbrillant in my writing. I can think of things to write about but can’t find the motivation to do it and then promptly don’t like anything I write. It is just one of those weeks. Not bad, just blah!
In the midst of feeling frazzled and uninspired, I stopped and was just standing in the kitchen and Lilly smiled at me. For no reason at all, she just saw me and she smiled. In the midst of my internal battle she was there, playing in her high chair and she didn’t care if the house was messy, or if I needed a shower. She didn’t care about my blog and if I had posted enough this week. She was just there, enjoying her morning. Her smile flipped a switch in my head… who cares if there are 4 loads of laundry to be folded, paw prints on the floor and dirty dishes on the sink and counters? Will the world end if I look semi-homeless and messy? Yes I’m a stay-at-home-mom and part of my job is to clean and keep the house together, but first and foremost raising my baby is my job. I can spend all day making my home perfect, but at the end of that day if she isn’t happy and healthy it really doesn’t matter!
It is easy to beat yourself up over not being perfect, to compare yourself to the moms on Pinterest and Instagram who seemingly have it all together. But I realized this… they probably don’t have it all together all the time either! You know what else? It’s okay, it’s more than okay if we don't! We think we should always have our home in perfect order but if we did we'd never have time to enjoy anything else. Because these days are short.
When I finally realized that it all didn’t matter and that it was ok to not feel like supermom I felt better, not perfect but better. So if you’re having one of those days or weeks just let it go. Let the dishes be dirty, let the laundry go unfolded, let the floor can be paw-printed. The only thing you must do, everyday, is hug your baby and make them smile. Do something to make yourself feel good and tell yourself you’re doing great! Because you are.